Monday, 31 October 2011

this season

was a season of close calls, heart break,

 internal realizations & growth

i heard

last night you two talked,
i'm proud of him, y'know.
he has his moments of maturity.
where he shows the man he truly is,
the man i love so dearly. 


i have a new lover every night,

Sunday, 30 October 2011

but i do

  love my wine,

bottoms up,

the concept of intoxication, the scene, the presentation it's gorgeous isn't it? Tumblr_lstdw68kvy1r1is1go1_500_large
gentlemen become aggressive fools,
ladies turn into disrespected whores,

to put it mildly, i get annoyed

i went to sleep

& woke up frustrated
i wish i could control who my mind entertains in the night,
in my dreams you may get away with it,
but you don't stand a chance in person; boy

Saturday, 29 October 2011

this is why

i never wanted to tell you
now you assume what happened with him 
will happen with every guy..

time to go,

let's spin the hand, & head wherever it points
home is you
was you,
& now you're gone
it's time i leave,

when the world slowed down,

among that indistinguishable collaboration of twisted dreams,
one i remember
calling you out, as the asshole you are.

part of me wonders how different last night would have been had i not sent that text on Friday, October 14th, 2011 - 2:23 pm

wow shit really hit the


Friday, 28 October 2011


it's not as fun as it looks
it's not as fun as it looks
it's not as fun as it looks
it's not as fun as it looks
it's not as fun as it looks
it's not as fun as it looks

one day i'll look back & applaud 
a slow, resounding clap

sappy i know,

[but you will be in my heart
always, forever]
i've never been this vulnerable in my entire life
i don't know that i mind it,


the good
the bad
& ugly
happy halloween, i suppose
i will never stop now

'twas a good run,

i sincerely appreciate the inspiration,
this'll help me get through many difficult times - of that i'm sure
but i need you to stop reading these now
go back to talking to her
in your beautiful way

lord, if it's not too much to ask


can i be that beautiful woman one day?

last night i had a dream,

we were inseparably entwined
like a piece of rope 
made out of two pieces of vine
held together, 
holding each other
with no one else in mind
like two atoms in a molecule
inseparably combined

Thursday, 27 October 2011

i don't mean to be rude..

but uh, piss off
don't think i don't know exactly what you're all about
i may be young,
but i wasn't born yesterday


to a life so sunk it's not worthy to breathe
so the ship sails on to its perfect defeat
drink a bottle of captains 'til you wash up on shore

now wake up
i'll seek you out
flay you alive
one more word & you won't survive
i see right through you any hour
so nothings learned, no triumphant return

i pray you feel what i feel 

[don't] call me when you're sober [ever]

you're back to your old ways,
& i'm back to mine
it seems i've enabled your own destruction
good luck finding me now

Tuesday, 25 October 2011


once i had a dream
once i had a hope
that was yesterday
not so long ago
this is not the end
this is just the world
such a foolish thing
i was such an honest girl

it says,

you are : available
oh please
shave your hair
break my heart 

i wanna be,


the girl you look back on, 
years from now
& applaud
for doing what she believed was right 
even if it sucked for the both of you,

the girl who is ambitious, passionate
confident in who she is - always strong-willed

always young at heart
always in your eyes,
beautiful inside & out

not just another notch, 

Monday, 24 October 2011

there are times


in our lives,
where we're just barely hanging on

it feels like,

it's been so many miles & so long since i've met you

if i had a boat,

every time we touch you move - you have different eyes
for each time your heart arrives

if this was a new land darling, you'd be the find
i wanted to keep you close; to make you mine
wherever you go - all the different places you know
whatever you hear - all the things your restless spirit needed to hear

it's a different heat
to all the other things that you meet

so don't close the door...

Friday, 21 October 2011


let's play a game
i don't say a word
& you let me show you
what's going on inside this head of mine

16 days,

yeah we'll go somewhere warmer
yeah we'll go somewhere new

bahamas, i'm ready for ya
hit me

Wednesday, 19 October 2011

show, don't tell

the mirror fools even the best of us,
you once told me 
you don't truly know what you look like
you always see yourself through man made objects
or through someone else's eyes
you never truly know what you look like
so this what you desire?
in getting this,
you'll lose who you are
which is what i love you for

i'll show you,
that even when you're old & grey
you still are wonderfully made
as i grow old, & as i grow grey
maybe then my heart will behave 
when i'm around you

Tuesday, 18 October 2011

to who it may concern,

keep your good-natured curiosity to yourself
because we all know you don't really care
besides; you really don't want to see what she's like now
she's a mess, & she knows it
she doesn't care if she shows it
you wouldn't want to see her now
so let her be
give her her peace
that she so desperately needs

she crosses her arms

to keep herself from falling apart

is there a remedy,

for hating every second i'm without you?
you're all i see
all of me
is all for you
you're all i need
all this life is all for love
it's the only road i'll choose
& every street & avenue
only one will lead me to you

what a love,
what a love,
what a love

Monday, 17 October 2011

stay classy,

Ladies - some helpful tips for you :
NO. 2 - be the woman a man needs, not the woman that needs a man
        3 - always accept a compliment
        12 - Being single doesn't mean you're weak. it means you're strong enough to wait for what you really deserve
        14 - A real lady holds her head high, but never her nose
        15 - Never underestimate the power of a warm greeting
        17 - A lady knows her limits no matter what, stick to your guns
        20 - A subtle, yet noticeable lip bite possesses exceptional power. Use with caution
        23 - Never let a man define you. Be amazing on your own
        25 - Don't get your hopes up, don't let your guard down
        26 - If you're not worth the trouble, then he's not worth the time
        27 - Be refined, polite & well-spoken
        32 - Your dresses should be tight enough to show you're a woman, but loose enough to show you're a lady
        36 - A true lady doesn't start fights, but sure knows how to finish them
        41 - If you don't stand up for yourself, no one will
        43 - Never underestimate the power of a name. Use them. Be remembered.
        44 - You can never be beautiful unless you're happy.
        45 - Chew like you have a secret.
        47 - Maintain your mystery; men love a good hunt.
        48 - One can never be too classy.
        51 - Don't wait for Prince Charming to come & save you. Remember being independent is more attractive to men. 
        54 - You will never find the right guy if you are looking for the wrong reasons
        60 - A sincere smile is a lady's most beautiful feature
        63 - Modesty isn't always overrated. A little mystery never hurt anyone. 
        67 -  You shouldn't need to raise your voice. if you're dealing with a person who won't listen unless you speak forcefully, then they aren't worth dealing with
        68 - Never apologize for what you feel. It's like saying sorry for being real
        71 - Never make a man a priority in your life if you are just an option in his
        72 - A lady should be able to make a man smile with her clothes on
        81 - Remember; the treasure doesn't do the hunting
        84 - Respect from others comes from self-respect
        88 - Being intelligent is sexy, don't play stupid
        89 - Just because someone invites you to drama does not mean you have to rsvp
        90 - look up the definition of sophistication. Embody it.
        92 - Remember; all limitations are self imposed   

i see hair,

my hands miss the feel of that beautiful hair of yours..
don't cut it.

an addiction, two hands & feet

i'm walking through the city like a drunk but not
& i am one of your people but the cars don't stop
it's been a long since i've been touched
now i'm getting touched all the time
&it's only a matter of whom
&it's only a matter of when

*you are the most beautiful woman alive.

i hope you know what an inspiration you are to so many women

someway, you're still part of me - apart from me

but you just
 & all at once, i knew i was not magnificent
but i can see for miles, miles, miles

you owe it

to yourself
to have the time of your life
only you are to blame
if you do not live it up
 choose happiness
choose freedom
live up every moment
of every day
every opportunity
presented to you
you owe it to yourself