you're always on

chasing the good feels

"You are a woman. Skin and bones, veins and nerves, hair and sweat. You are not made of metaphors. Not apologies, not excuses."

-Sarah Kay, 

grown on me

Given a length of time

and for some reason

you're the one i'll always tell

but a look like hers can be found from time to time

yum. 

Four years, Six years,...

?

twenty somethings

If you're reading this and still don't understand by now, why the door between us is closed;
Well, it may be for the best, that you don't. 

time i leave

turnaround

Maybe it's time you leave. 

blurry

“And kid, you've got to love yourself. You've got wake up at four in the morning, brew black coffee, and stare at the birds drowning in the darkness of the dawn. You've got to sit next to the man at the train station who’s reading your favorite book and start a conversation. You've got to come home after a bad day and burn your skin from a shower. Then you've got to wash all your sheets until they smell of lemon detergent you bought for four dollars at the local grocery store. You've got to stop taking everything so goddamn personally. You are not the moon kissing the black sky. You've got to compliment someones crooked brows at an art fair and tell them that their eyes remind you of green swimming pools in mid July. You've got to stop letting yourself get upset about things that won’t matter in two years. Sleep in on Saturday mornings and wake yourself up early on Sunday. You've got to stop worrying about what you’re going to tell her when she finds out. You've got to stop over thinking why he stopped caring about you over six months ago. You've got to stop asking everyone for their opinions. Fuck it. Love yourself, kiddo. You've got to love yourself.”

Always

I.
When I was trying to quit smoking
and we drank white wine from Mason jars,
you called my freckles cocoa powder
and I called your green eyes
celery.

II.
I am learning how to be a grown-up
who pays bills, cooks her own meals,
and doesn’t cry at words like
I think I just want to be friends.

III.
The truth is this:
Love is an organic thing.
It rots and softens.

-All That’s Left To Tell, Clementine von Radics

my bedview

 





one day
will be my best view

Words I never want to say to you is :

                                                                                             goodbye

beauty

It's time i stop neglecting it

i think there's value in getting lost

try

she's a souvenir shop, where he goes

to remember how much people miss him

when he is gone.

“One night they fell asleep, side by side. He slept curled upon her back; a dark comma against her pale, elegant phrase.”

—	A. S. Byatt, Possession

Two years

In two days

Marks two years of growth

At times; painful

And like the sea, i'm constantly changing from calm to hell. 

reward

my reward; day after day

"She naturally loved solitary places, vast views, and to feel herself forever and ever alone."

Virginia Woolf - Orlando

This time last year