Filling the gaps where you should be

I'm going to lose you forever
if you give up, and continue
pushing me away

Literally and permanently
lose you.

split shifts

like a mothafucka

Once again, going under the

I don't belong in Saskatoon.
I don't belong in Canada.

am·biv·a·lence

And some will say it's not even healthy

But body is young and mind is sure

That something is alright with your thinking

our bodies spilled together
sleeping
the tiny flowing currents
immediate and forever
your leg my leg
your arm my arm
your smile and the warmth
of you
who made me laugh.

Charles Bukowski

last night

Suitcase heart

It's the second September I have known you

And all that time, I felt just fine


I held so many people in my suitcase heart


I didn't know the way 
so it took me 'till today to get here
But I've begun to trust the view here.

Lost in the lakes and shapes that your body make

I trace my fingertips along your trails
Your body was the map I was lost in

construedpast participle, past tense of con·strue (Verb)

Verb:

Interpret (a word or action) in a particular way. Analyze the syntax of (a text, sentence, or word).

What other choice is there, really

In these November skies
I see you everywhere

decisive

You're the one that I want

Blue stars

Every woman I've ever loved, a little

has a tattoo on her foot.

you speak to me with

It may have been half a lie



When I said I didn't see you by my side,
years ahead of now

Mama, I've got your wild-eyed ways

Ices

I lust for both 

your voice & hair

(DON'T) give me sympathy

Sympathy only salts the wound,

The wound I can no longer cry for.

All that resonates is melancholia.

Lol

Unfriending me on Facebook is definitely the best way to handle rejection

I laughed out loud

I've got my heart right here

"I've settled down since then." I lied

Your Rocky Spine

It was another one of those type of dreams

The ones you can't wake up from

An appropriate ending

to the worst day

hon·es·ty/ˈänistē/

Noun:

The quality of being honest.

broke girl

Oh why did I have to see this picture

aka) my next tattoo

fuck

 

pendulum

It's amazing how far the pendulum can swing, in your life
One moment you find yourself vibrating with nervousness of potential rejection
The next, practically leaping out of your skin with joy at your success
Then indecisive, in making what you hope to be the best choice for something you love
To feeling sick to your stomach with sorrow as you watch the light go out in their eyes
Immediately filled with regret as you say goodbye to something you'd hoped to forever avoid
The life of a companion, who never said much of anything at all, never needed to
And in that moment, nothing can stop the uncontrollable sobs from escaping your lips

"Just in case you missed seeing my beautiful face plastered all over the internet, I'll make sure to do it one more time all over here for your benefit. No need to thank me for my consideration."

-

Or something like that

consumed

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

I`ll admit

I have it bad

are you thinking of me tonight?

through your eyes

This, I feel myself slowly becoming

In the quiet,

In the in-betweens

I

"I love you."

...

"Thanks"

imploding is inevitable

I hate waiting
I hate waiting
I hate waiting

presently

block

It's an uncomfortable position that I find myself in

this block, that I'm once again experiencing

where my potential seems well out of my reach.

I know it won't last, it never does

but the restless nights 

last far beyond the block.

They say my expectations are endless

I say I'm full of aspirations

I was born a visionary.

my boys

First  two verses. 

This woman knows a few things.

Each day I fight the fear that the void inside me, will be unsatisfied by the constant music which it's always lathered with.

"I have not felt you
for so many days,
so many nights.
I have sat next to a stranger
I have held the hand of a ghost
I have kissed the lips of a phantom
and I have put my arm around the empty space
you should be filling"

In my mind, I have thought 

these words you speak aloud

wipe my slate
and all that's left
is the residue of you